I'm So Mad at Myself

I was up 2.2 lbs this week. I have no idea why I'm having such a hard time with this. I know what I have to do, but I don't do it.
I did have some challenges, like being away last weekend. I tried to make healthy choices, like we went to McDonalds and I got a grilled chicken sandwich. I got out to the car, and we were on the highway, I went to try it, and it wasn't grilled. I couldn't take it back because we were racing for the ferry. But I should have just let Zach eat it and gotten something else later. No more excuses. I weighed myself this morning and I think I've lost most of the 2 lbs, but it's still really frustrating.

I did have a plan for lots of AP's this week, but I went and hurt my ankle so now I can't walk.

But I'm gardening all weekend, so maybe that will get some exercise in. Today is a new day, so I'm off to a new start

This isn't diet related...

but I need somewhere to be able to say how sad I am of the passing of an amazing person. One of my good friends from high school, Erika Heller, passed away today. She was the first person I met when I started at my new school. She was kind and generous from the minute we met, and even though we lost touch for a number of years, I still always considered her a good friend.

She was and always will be one of the most amazing people I've ever met. She was a spokesperson for "Look Good, Feel Better", an organization for women with cancer. She was beautiful inside and out, and made the world a much better place in the 31 short years she was here.

I know you're not in pain anymore Erika. You'll always be remembered.

Update

So I lost 1.8 lbs last week, then was really good Thursday and most of Friday, then it all went to pot over the weekend. I knew it would be hard being away all weekend and not having much money so we'd be eating a lot of fast food. I thought I was prepared, but I guess I wasn't prepared enough.

But when we got to the wedding (after I'd been cheating all day), I got to see one of my best friends who I haven't seen in months. And low and behold, she joined ww and has lost 30 lbs. She looks totally amazing. It was just what I needed to get back on track.

So I vowed to eat right today (which I mostly did, until we went out for dinner) and get back walking tomorrow. Then I pulled my Achilles heel, and now I can hardly stand, let alone walk. Luckily we have no money left from our weekend away, and no food, so that should help in my weight loss this week ;)

Send my good vibes

I weigh in in T minus 5 hours (I need to go back to bed)

I think I did it

I think I managed to go camping and not gain 42 pounds. I was up a bit yesterday morning, but I think I'm back down again today.
Of course the truth will come out on Thursday at my weigh in.

Here's what I did. I shopped smart, bought veggie dogs, whole wheat wraps instead of buns. I took a case of diet pepsi and made a big salad and veggies and dip. I did take two bags of chips, but usually I get one of each flavour, just in case I feel like Dill Pickle chips in the middle of the night.

The other big difference this time, was I got some AP's. On Saturday we went for a big hike up the the Goldstream Train Trestle. It took 2 hours to get there and it's about 150 meters down, so needless to say once we got there, Jude and I stayed safely on solid ground while Zach explored the trestle with our friend Gayle.




Kathy and I (with baby Jude of course) on the train tracks










Zach and Gayle on the trestle





And on Sunday we did a shorter hike in the opposite direction along the stream. Anywho....my point is, I'm pretty darn proud of myself for mostly sticking with it this weekend.

Of course next weekend we're off to Penticton for a wedding, which could be even more challenging! But it's only Tuesday, so I have at least three days to plan for that. But I'd really like to be in the 220's before Canada Day.

Now I'm just going to throw in some brag pictures for shits and giggles :)





My hot husband










our little family

dieting and camping

and there's my problem for the weekend. Food and camping go together like smores and camping, or hotdogs and campfires, or sitting around and drinking beer, or cooking bacon over a camp stove. *sigh* this is how I get myself into trouble.

We bought a new-to-us camper a few weeks ago and are taking it out for it's innagural run this long weekend. But we're being smart about it. We're camping about 20 minutes from our house in case the whole thing goes awry. Baby Jude and camping may not go together as well as say, chips and dip and camping. Oh my god make it stop!

I'm trying to plan ahead. We're only going for two nights, which means we'll probably need to rent a trailer to pull behind the camper with all the baby accessories in it. But food wise we're having steak one night and chicken the next. I'm going to make a big bag of green salad to throw in the fridge, along with some home made dressing and cut up some veggies.

I was going to skip even buying chips, but lets face it, I know I'll just eat someone else's (we're going with a group of people). I'll make soup for lunch, maybe some grilled cheese with light cheese slices (lots of nutritional value there). Otherwise, I'm wide open for suggestions.

I've vowed to avoid the smores, but I'm going to have to have a few beer. Jude is pretty good at keeping me on track there. Nothing like waking up at 5 am with a screaming baby and a screaming hang over!

I sneaked a peek

at the scale, and I was up three pounds *sigh*. I did cheat a lot this weekend (see previous post), but I thought I might have at least broken even.

I have another day to take it off before my weigh in Thursday. I'm going to be tres disappointed if I gain.

I really need to get on here more

I might have to expand this blog to be about things other than weight loss. I'll have to think on that.

So I bought a three month journal last week, and didn't write a thing in it. I went to WI on Thursday and somehow managed to lose 0.2. It was honestly a miracle.

So Friday morning I start tracking...I'm oh so good, track it all, even leave room for a Martini at the end of the day. Go over to a friends house...and then the snacking started. And the tracking stopped.

Enter Saturday. I'm such a good girl, track all morning. Then go out for Mother's Day dinner...the snacking starts, the tracking stops.

So now we're on to Sunday. I don't even pull out the tracker. Zach and Jude took me out for breakfast for my first Mother's Day. Do I order an egg white omelet? Maybe fruit and yogurt? Nope...I go for the gold. Eggs Benny with bacon and mushrooms, hash browns (you know the really good ones, the cubes of deep fried potatoes? those are the ones I got). And because that wasn't enough, I topped it off with an order of sourdough toast. I guess the English Muffin it came with just wasn't enough carbs. I forced Jude to nurse when I got home to try and burn off some of those calories.

So I skipped lunch (because that's healthy). Then we had people over for dinner. I ate chips, a burger and green salad. Now that wasn't so bad, but why stop there? I topped it off with a piece of Boston Cream Pie (which I forgot about until I started typing this).

So I go back to my tracker and decide to try and write down what I had yesterday. I think I ate all my points at breakfast. I was -14 for the day (and don't forget, that didn't include the pie!).

But I'm back on track this morning. I had a cup of coffee and measured out my fat free french vanilla creamer, had a dry English Muffin, an egg and two cheese slices for a grand total of 10 pts for breakfast. Luckily I still get a couple of extra points for nursing and I'm pretty fat so I get a generous DPA anyway :)

Question of the day

Do you count points on your birthday?

so clearly this isn't working

I skipped my meeting last week, but sucked it up and went yesterday. I was only up .6, which I was pretty happy with.

I resolved to get back on track. But then I went to the Keg for a pre-birthday dinner. I managed to consume 56 points, and that isn't counting the cream and sugar in my coffee, or the crab and horseradish sauce on top of my steak, which if I had to guess, would have been at least another 15 points.

I can't believe the amount of fat and calories in Keg food. For instance


three cheese butter (just the butter, not the potato)
364 calories
36.5 grams of fat

the steak (without the sauce)
542 calories
37.5 grams of fat

and best of all, the spinach and artichoke dip
1115 calories
71 grams of fat

and these are all things I ate. I have a wicked food hangover this morning.

But on a plus side, I bought a three month journal at my meeting yesterday. Maybe having an actual book rather than those stupid paper things will help.